Dispatch from Edinburgh-Scottish FoodFest ’06

Seeing as Hatbox Louie and I are leaving Edinburgh on Monday, we decided to have a Scottish foodfest. The Bill of Fare:

Haggis
Bubble and Squeak (Rumbledethumps)
Toad in the Hole
Scottish Kippers
Potato Scones
Whiskey

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Haggis— Sheep’s ‘Pluck’: heart, liver, lungs. With onion, oatmeal, suet, and spices. Boiled in the animal’s stomach. Scotland’s answer to the Hot Pocket.

Holy Heavenly Haggis

Origin: Intense nourishment for old Scottish cattle drovers during their long trip down through the glens to the market in Edinburgh.

Robert Burns wrote of haggis:

“Fair Fa’ your honest, sonsie face, Great chieftain o’ the pudding-race!”

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World Record: 1.5 pound haggis hurled 180ft 10 in. on an island in Loch Lomond in 1984.

Review: Hatbox Louie says…

“Creamy, spicy, Scottish risotto. Haggis is a culinary joke, but if you served it in New York or San Francisco, you’d get $30 a plate. As long as you called it something else. It’s a marketing problem.” After a large sip of whiskey: “You know the Scots are gonna be independent when they eat this stuff, this is nation-building food.”

Hatbox Louie’s response to my question, “Do you want my casing?”: near-gagging. I took that as a qualified no.

Bubble and Squeak: (Rumbledethumps in Scotland) Shallow-fried leftover veg from a roast dinner. In effect, here in Scotland, mashed potatoes and cabbage.

Review: Hatbox Louie says…

“What’s not to like? It’s mashed potatoes. I admire them not getting too hung up on the veggies. They use them like we use parsley.”

Toad in the Hole: Sausages in Yorkshire pudding batter.

Review: Hatbox Louie says…

“The hole, I love. The toad, I’m not so sure. Now put some haggis in the hole and you’ve got something.”

Kippers: Scottish Herring split in half, and cold smoked.

Review: Hatbox Louie says…

“Fishiest, saltiest thing ever. It’s the fish that ate the fish, that ate the fish. Then whipped up with some fish extract. I like it.”

Potato Scones: If latkes were like regular pancakes, but with potatoes in the batter. Obviously delicious.

And so it passed. We could not quench our thirst for water after this meal. I felt the entire weight of Her Majesty’s Empire lowering my center of gravity. If not for the courage of the fearless whiskey, I might even have cared.

It was not a light meal, but as a gesture of leave-taking, it was the right meal.

Scotland, adieu.

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Published in: on December 15, 2006 at 4:40 pm  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. The potato scones sound scrumptious, and I would have to try anything called ‘Rumbledethumps’ – the name is too fun to pass up. The rest…let’s just say I’d need an awful lot of whiskey.


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